Abraham Lincoln has been repeatedly voted as our most popular president, probably because he achieved great results in incredibly difficult circumstances. But did you ever stop to think, how did he do it? What was his secret and what is the key to the success of other “great leaders?”
Thanks to a survey of hundreds of managers and supervisors, we have obtained key insights into what makes a great leader.
This “My Greatest Leader” survey, conducted in several large corporations where RightPath Resources facilitates leadership development, revealed more than 120 different attributes. These attributes can be broken into the five basic building blocks of leadership—Character, Emotional Stability, Relationships, Results, and Competence. The best leaders exhibit qualities from all five building blocks; however, the two that bear special attention here are Results and Relationship behaviors. These two attributes were mentioned more often than all the others.
Relationship-oriented and Results-oriented attributes correlate very closely with naturally- motivated behaviors (also called personality). These behaviors are absolutely critical to success, and they are excellent areas for potential growth for almost all leaders.
While working with thousands of people over the years, we have discovered a natural seesaw effect between relationships and results; that is, most people tend to be good at (and inclined toward) one and struggle with (neglect or avoid) the other.
So if you are naturally good at setting standards and holding people accountable (Results-oriented), then you are likely to struggle with Relationship-oriented behaviors like listening, encouraging, and showing empathy, and vice versa.
 Results-oriented Behaviors
Results-oriented behaviors typically get a lot of attention because they are so obviously inherent to success. Without them, you can’t achieve goals or stay in business. It’s only natural that organizations have very sophisticated ways of keeping score on how effective leaders are at getting results. In most companies, there seems to be a constant mantra coming down from the top—“results count.”
Interestingly, the survey also showed that when people looked up and reflected on their “greatest leaders,” they, too, had a high regard for those who exhibited Results-oriented behaviors.
We all have a natural desire to achieve and, therefore, like to follow someone who can lead us to new heights and great victories. The Results behaviors begin with vision and include the energy and drive to challenge people to do their best. Shown below are the top ranked Results-oriented behaviors in the survey.
- Big Picture, Visionary, Strategic
- Straightforward, Clear Expectations
- Strong Work Ethic, Good Problem Solver
- Decisive, Gives Direction, Firm (But Flexible)
- High Standards/Goals for Self and Others
It was interesting to note that of the people surveyed, regardless of whether they were Results-oriented or Relationship-oriented, both types valued leaders who set and enforced high standards. Furthermore, they wanted clear expectations, firm boundaries, and challenging work.
President Lincoln experienced great frustration early in the Civil War because there was little action and not much result on the battlefield. His top generals would not initiate the fight, delaying action in order to “recruit more soldiers,” or “get more training,” or “rest the horses.” He kindly and patiently tried to encourage them, but with little success. Ultimately, he had to fire three successive rounds of Generals before he discovered Ulysses S. Grant, a leader who took the initiative and got results.
Relationship-oriented Behaviors
The ability to build good relationships is one of the most powerful assets a leader can have. Believing that someone else—especially your leader—cares about you and believes in you is a powerful motivator. That’s why the following Relationship-oriented behaviors are so powerful for leading, managing, mentoring, and coaching.
- Good Listener
- Cared, Concerned About Me
- Trusted Me to Do the Job
- Supportive, Lent a Helping Hand
- Respected Others and Me
Pause for a moment and reflect on your greatest leader. No matter how results-oriented you may be, it’s likely that these relationship attributes were evident in that person’s style and played a key role in your personal development and success.
The Dilemma and Irony of the Relationships–Results Seesaw
Leaders must get results to stay in business and be competitive, but they also need to build relationships because it’s people (with motivations and emotions) who do the work. Therefore both are essential to good leadership. But the dilemma is that most leaders are good at one and struggle with the other.
The struggle comes because these attributes are highly correlated to a person’s “go to” behavioral style. So, by nature, some people are Relationship- oriented and some are Results-oriented. Typically, for each of us, one is easy and one a struggle. The side of the seesaw that’s a struggle may not be a weakness, but it will require a conscious (and usually stretching) effort to carry out those behaviors. They are a struggle because it's going against the grain or the natural flow of our behaviors.
As already noted, organizational survival and success logically dictate a strong push for results. Consequently, companies are more likely to select “results-oriented” people for leadership roles. Thus, in most organizations, it’s the relationship side of the seesaw that is not in balance.
Results Count, and Relationship Behaviors Enhance Results
The irony is that good relationships get better results. Twenty years of research by the Gallup Organization reveals that good relationships improve both productivity and retention. This body of evidence provided the central theme for the highly popular business book, First Break All the Rules: What the World’s Greatest Managers Do Differently. In it, the authors point out that “The talented employee may join a company because of its charismatic leaders, its generous benefits, and its world-class training programs, but how long that employee stays and how productive he is while he is there is determined by his relationship with his immediate supervisor.”1
Exit interviews taken by RightPath’s clients provide similar evidence—talented people leave because of poor relationships with their immediate boss.
Leading through relationship behaviors is often a challenge for Results-oriented people because it “feels” soft. Also, it’s not natural for them to think this way. As one highly Results-oriented leader said, “It doesn’t occur to me to encourage people, because I don’t need it. I can just look at the numbers and see how we are doing, and that’s enough for me.”
But what he was missing was that many of his people were starving for positive feedback— especially his more extroverted people who needed a regular dose of approval to stay at their peak. In reality, everyone needs encouragement, and many of the “tough” leaders forget that they admired the leaders who listened to them, supported them, and communicated their high regard for their talents and efforts.
Listening is the Most Powerful Tool to Build Relationships and Get More Results
It should not be a surprise that listening was the top rated (most frequently cited) leadership attribute in our survey. Those who study leadership and motivation also consistently cite it as the key to good relationships. Real listening encompasses the essence of most of the other relationship attributes and is highly correlated to “empathy,” which is a powerful trust builder.
In his best selling book, Primal Leadership, emotional intelligence (EQ) guru Daniel Goleman describes empathy as “Sensing others’ emotions, understanding their perspective, and taking active interest in their concerns.”2 He goes on to say that “empathy is the sine qua non of all social effectiveness at work.”3 Thus we see that empathic listening with a willingness to show caring concern for the other person is one of the key indicators of high EQ that is so integral to good leadership.
Listening is Very Difficult for Results-oriented Leaders!
During RightPath’s Managing Differences workshop, we find remarkable honesty among Results-oriented leaders who are willing to admit and deal with the challenges of listening. This group is typically confident (opinionated), quick-minded and fast-paced (impatient), and thus not naturally equipped for listening. One senior leader, who is diligently trying to improve in this area, explained the struggle quite well, saying, “I am working on becoming a better listener, but it’s so hard. My mind seems to run so fast, it’s just hard to slow down and listen.”
Relationship Behaviors Take Time, But in the End Yield Results
Dealing with people on a personal basis does take time, but it’s the price of leadership. Abraham Lincoln was well known for his “open-door” policy, and he even remarked: “I do not often decline seeing people who call on me.” He also took every opportunity to meet socially with groups of his constituents, knowing that personal contact not only generated loyalty, but also provided him with valuable feedback. He explained his position saying: “I call these receptions ‘my public opinion baths’… and though they may not be pleasant in all particulars, the effect, as a whole, is renovating and invigorating.”4
One newspaper writer said of Lincoln that “all will agree that he is the embodiment of good temper and affability. They will all concede that he has a kind word, an encouraging smile, a humorous remark, for nearly all (who seek) his presence.”5 Lincoln explained the power of encouragement by saying “everyone likes a compliment.” He made it a point to lift others’ spirits. And, isn’t that what good leaders do—inspire us?
What Can You Do to Become a Better Leader?
 For the Results-oriented Leader…
Slow down, listen, and soften your tone. Realize that your natural inclination is probably to avoid the relationship behaviors because on the surface they don’t appear to contribute to results. Then, since these “people” behaviors may not “feel” natural, you will need to push yourself to stretch and adapt behaviors outside of your comfort zone.
Adapting your normal behavioral style will be easier if you frequently remind yourself of two things:
- Taking a genuine interest in the growth and development of your people (caring) is a compassionate thing to do.
- These behaviors increase confidence and inspire your followers to perform at a higher level and therefore produce better results with less turnover.
 Of course if your people are feeling better about their relationship with you, they are more confident and thus empowered to be better leaders and teammates themselves. Your investment has a positive multiplier effect that cascades down through the organization. Furthermore, you are modeling the very behaviors you need to be coaching to your developing leaders.
For the Relationship-oriented Leader…
Tighten up, toughen up, and actively deal with necessary conflict.
If you are naturally amiable and people-oriented, acknowledge that your desire for harmony has its down side too. Delaying “unpopular” decisions and avoiding conflict at all cost does not help the cause on either side of the leadership seesaw. Resolve to stand up for your beliefs and deal with difficult issues regardless of how it “feels” to you.
Remember that people want a leader who leads, so initiate and direct others to get results. Set and enforce reasonable boundaries and hold people accountable in a caring but firm way. Doing so will bring you into balance and win the respect of those on both sides of this seesaw. The normally amiable Lincoln succeeded because he adapted his behaviors to the needs of the situation. In Presidential Temperament, the authors say Lincoln “was predisposed to restrain himself… But when he was faced with Southern secession, he acted boldly and vigorously… When the crisis of the Civil War finally broke… the non-directive Rational Lincoln became ceaselessly active and persistently commanding.”6
Courage is the Key to Doing What’s Right, When it Doesn’t “Feel” Right
The secret of great leaders like Lincoln and so many others is their ability to do what needs to be done even when it doesn’t “feel” natural. Some wise sage has remarked that it’s difficult to feel our way into a new way of acting, so we have to act our way into a new way of feeling. This is the test of true courage—will a person do what is appropriate for the situation, even when it feels unnatural and uncomfortable?
For some, it will take courage to coach themselves into being an empathic listener. For others, it will take courage to deal with conflict. Regardless of your tilt, the question is do you have the courage to adapt your behaviors as needed? Though carrying out new behaviors is not the same as attacking a machine gun nest or charging into a burning building to rescue someone, it does take courage, and courage is an essential quality of great leadership.
The bottom line is that regardless of where we are in our leadership journey, we all can significantly advance our cause by developing some of those areas we would rather ignore. To be a great leader, it’s not an option to be either Results-oriented or Relationships-oriented—we have to do both. Lincoln did and we can too.
1 First, Break All the Rules, Marcus Buckingham and Curt Coffman (Gallup Organization, 1999) pages 11-12
2 Primal Leadership: Realizing the Power of Emotional Intelligence, Daniel Goleman, Richard Boyatzis and Annie McKee, (MA: Harvard Business School, 2002), page 39
3 Ibid., page 50
4 Lincoln on Leadership, Donald T. Phillips, 1992, (Warner Books, Inc., 1992) page 18
5 Ibid.
6 Presidential Temperament, Ray Choiniere, David Kiersey, (Prometheus Nemesis, 1992)
 About the Author
Lee F. Ellis is a founding partner and senior vice president of RightPath Resources Inc., a performance profiling and human capital management consulting company headquartered in Atlanta. He is responsible for product development of RightPATH 4 Profile™, RightPATH 6 Profile™, and the RightPATHING™ Your Future online career assessment. He is an executive coach and a corporate consultant in the areas of hiring, team building, leadership development, and succession planning. During his nearly 40-year career, Lee has also been an accomplished author, conference speaker, educator, and highly-decorated Air Force officer. He can be reached at 770.294.1111 or go to www.rigthpath.com. |